My immediate urge was to vent at the boys, tell them we needed to cut back on the Legos. But the little guys weren’t in the house. Once they’d heard the cleaning word that morning, they’d mysteriously disappeared outside to play with Nerf guns, another corporation we open our bank account to for the privilege of storing their products in our garage. (I am in the wrong business.)

After we finished cleaning the closet, I looked over the Lego city in the playroom once more and remembered a time over thirty years ago when I’d wanted a go-cart. My dad pointed out that all the money I’d spent on comic books over the years, the ones stacked in my room and in my closet, would have bought a nice go-cart. I eventually got my go-cart, but always felt a little guilty about the money “wasted” on the comics once I stopped reading them. 

But in the playroom, with the memory vivid in my mind, I realized something.

“Excuse me, sir,” the young man said, stopping a reasonable distance from me. The tie that had been swaying across his dress shirt as he walked now came to a standstill above his belt buckle and khaki pants. “My group is a ways back,” he continued. “I’m scouting campsites. Do you mind sharing this one?”

I appreciated his politeness, and my tension eased somewhat. “We don’t mind,” I said. “Plenty of room.”

He thanked us and then disappeared beyond the brush, leaving the four of us puzzled. We’d known other campers could join us at the pickup point, but nothing prepared me for business attire in the Utah desert.

As we continued working, the conversation turned to the past week:

It’s taken a long time to realize that those seemingly separate sides—writer and businessperson—are one and the same, and, in fact, in harmony. Years ago, I wanted to distance myself from the business persona, mainly because I had mundane images of it. When a business partner and I sold our company to another firm, I told myself I’d stick around for several years and draw a nice paycheck helping that organization integrate the old company while I transitioned my life to one of a writer.

I made great strides over those years, penning articles for increasingly better magazines, teaching a successful writing class, and even starting the novel I’d always threatened to write. When the time came that I felt I could no longer add anything to the parent company who bought us, I said goodbye, taking off a year to accomplish two goals: 1) to finish the novel, and 2) to lay the foundation for a new company that my future business partners and I could grow into a business that ran well with talented, trustworthy individuals we brought into the fold. Still, I felt I had to keep the two sides separate, mainly because I had mistakenly believed that being a writer and a business owner, were mutually exclusive. At least, that was the case until a past conversation flashed in my head and I discovered an epiphany within it.

Dena is an excellent writer who has penned articles for Writer's Digest and essays in five separate Chicken Soup for the Soul books. In 2010, Dena's self-help parody book, Who Moved My Mouse: A Self-Help Book for Cats (Who Don't Need Any Help), was published by Random House's Ten Speed Press division and subsequently translated into six languages. Currently, Dena is at work on her next big book idea.

The Write Motivation begins Tuesday, March 6, 2012 from 6:30 pm to 8:30 pm Tuesday May 22, 2012 from 6:30 pm to 8:30 pm and runs six weeks. Participants of any writing level are encouraged and will learn:

If you know Rich already, you understand what I'm conveying. If you don't, I only hope you get the chance to know him one day. Click here to read my post, Wisdom to Know the Difference, but please make sure you check out the rest of Rich's insights while you are there.

On April 3, 2012, Seal Press/Perseus Books, will publish her book Lessons from the Monk I Married. Half love story, half spirtual guide, the book is her memoir about the 15-year journey with her husband, a former Buddhist monk.

I look forward to reading her book when it comes out. Click here to read my guest post, but be sure to check out the other writers featured on Katherine's blog during the month of January, as well as her other posts.

Writer friends had warned me to decompress for a day or two before diving into writing. I took that advice to the extreme. By the fifth day, I finally stopped avoiding the blank page and sat down to get serious. But doubt filled my head rather than words filling the pages. Who was I kidding, I wondered? Did I truly have the writing chops to pen a novel? How could I make this book fly with my limited experience and flawed discipline? Even if I finished a quarter of the book in the remaining days, how would it be possible to return to the real world to complete it given a packed schedule and the multiple obstacles life liked to hurl at me? I sat on the deck that day with pen and paper in the late April sun and instead of pushing through and making it work, I focused on my flaws as a writer and the imperfect writing environment that awaited on my return. At the end of the day only meaningless scribbles emerged.

By the middle of the sixth day, I could no longer tolerate the stench of the garbage I’d written so I grabbed my camera and drove to a nearby hiking trail to walk off my frustration. Taking photos of nature relaxes me. If I couldn’t find the perfect words, at least I hoped to find some perfect shots. The trail I chose had a sign at the entrance that gently warned of predators: black bears, bobcats, and snakes. Had I actually stacked up some good writing over those six days at the cabin, maybe I would have hesitated, but the thought of becoming a bear’s meal seemed more appealing at that moment than

I took John flying over farmland he’d recently purchased so he could get a bird's eye view. His good friend and new neighbor, Neal, joined us. Neal, a developer in the Charlottesville area, is a great guy in his own right. His land is adjacent to John’s and they both enjoyed seeing their acreage from the air. It’s always intriguing for me to watch “aha moments” as people see something from a different perspective.

After a smooth flight we touched down to knock around Charlottesville for the day. Neal headed off to a business meeting while John and I hit Keswick Hall for bloody marys on the deck that overlooks the hotel’s stunning golf course. Later we regrouped with Neal at the Downtown Pedestrian Mall, a bricked-in area on the city’s early Main Street. Strolling to lunch, we passed John Grisham eating at an outside table within a stone’s throw of the writing office he has above the mall. Once we finished lunch, Neal ran off to make his next deal but promised to meet us for dinner.

John and I spent the afternoon exploring his future farm. We covered a good portion of the hundred-plus acres, zipping through wooded trails on a John Deere Gator. Stopping at various landmarks we’d seen from the air, we walked as John explained his plans for them. On one trail, a deep blue glint caught my eye.

When I think about this in broader terms, I realize it applies to any accomplishment in life. I can’t think of any goal worth achieving that is performed without effort, or more specifically, without being “uncomfortable” in some manner. Yet, we seem to have become a nation that seeks comfort. We chase it instead of our dreams. We seek the path of least resistance instead of the path to enlightenment.

And it’s making us soft... mentally, physically, and spiritually.

For many of us, our days are filled with numerous activities that get us nowhere. We do them because they make us feel comfortable. They suck us in. Who hasn’t misplaced an hour or two getting lost in the internet or a few television shows? But we don’t seek out these activities because we truly desire them. No, we bury ourselves in them because we are avoiding something. Some may say we are avoiding our dreams, or success, but frankly, what we are really avoiding is the hard work, time, and effort that it takes to be:

-Great

-Fulfilled

-Content

What are you avoiding because you’ve been confusing comfort with happiness?

Do something today that makes you uncomfortable.

Related Posts:

Live Your Future Now

The Most Important Promise

The Real Questions Are...

• Read
• Write
• Hike
• Camp
• Spend more time outdoors
• Work in the garden
• Exercise
• Spend time with friends

I’ve yet to hear anyone say they would:

• Eat more
• Watch more television
• Surf the internet more

The question is great because the answers always remind me that most of the things we all want for ourselves, are simple activities we can have now. Yet so many defer them until they “have enough money” or “have more time.”

I’m not sure how many of us will ever “have enough money” or “have more time.” That’s why it’s important to recognize how much we defer living, waiting for a future that may never come. What do you dream of doing one day? How can you do it now instead of waiting?